The Twin Flame Pause
The Twin Flame pause.
I didn't know I would come to such a pause. But, what is this pause...?
I have been avidly following all Twin Flame guidance online, receiving wisdom through my downloads and even coaching some amazing Twin Flames on their journey.
And now, I have a pause.
The pause comes when the Twin Flame Runner starts to face the Core Reason of why they run.
How did I get here?
Well, first, if you would like to catch up on my Twin Flame journey, do read my Confessions Of A Twin Flame Runner
My Twin Flame entered my life many months ago when I felt like I was in the Surrender stage of the Union. It was a difficult transition for us both to start from scratch after such a long silence. But, we managed.
We managed by being completely honest with each other, no matter what. A real friendship started developing. A friendship I didn't know could even exist between Twin Flames.
Did I still want him? Hell yes!!!
Was it going to happen? I didn't know any more... All that mattered was that wow...we were finally on the same page.
He was emotionally and spiritually more mature than before. I knew that our Separation had matured us to a point where we could face each other.
Now, whether I would run again...I didn't know. And I knew he was terrified of losing me again...
Yet, we persevered. We shared everything. He told me about his life and I told him about my work. Yes...a friendship was developing.
As the months passed, I did start to feel the pangs of the usual Pain that I would experience on our journery before. I knew this was the reason why I would Run in the past. I was terrified. Great...am I going to Run again?
No...I won't have it any more! No more running!
I am BETTER than this! It's horrible being apart. It always feels like my Soul tears Itself to painful pieces...and the Pain is... unbearable.
But this Pain that was rising within me was equally becoming...unbearable.
What was this Pain? Oh God...please help me.
Then, just as expected, I said something really stupid to my Twin Flame because I felt like hiding...I didn't run. I just said something along the lines of needing space.
But I didn't want space damn it?!
He gave me space but he knew we had to communicate openly. So, he was patient until I relented and confessed what was going on.
There is a Pain deep within that has been rising since the day we met. I had to tune inward and navigate my Soul to find it.
It was the Pain of our First Separation that happened aeons ago as Souls...
This Pain was searingly horrid, sad and hollow. It felt empty and dark. And rather big. Like a gaping hole.
For the first time, I was looking at this Pain rather than running from it.
My knees were buckling. I was crying inconsolably. Oh dear...this is painful.
But, I had to FEEL it.
I had never given a chance for this Pain to be acknowledged. Yes...I had to honour this Pain. Accept that it was there.
And my Twin Flame was still here. Supporting me. Like a real friend would.
I was no longer running, I told myself.
I am going to get through this.
And then...I felt it. A space. A silence. A stillness.
There it was. The Twin Flame Pause...is what I felt like calling...It.
A complete total stillness that felt like I was in a cocoon of protection, safety, love, healing...Separate but NOT apart from my Twin Flame or the journey.
It felt like he was on his journey but I was 'taken away' from mine for a while. Lifted up to a strange place that didn't feel very linear or parallel to his.
It was like I was making a pit stop somewhere. But where...?
Like I stepped off the road of Twin Flame Union and stopped at a restaurant for a drink.
It felt like I was being given space to comprehend this Pain. To understand it. To peel the layers. To heal the root cause.
Are my Divine Guides doing this? Helo? Can you guys hear me?
I had never read about anything that felt like this before. Maybe it's something new...
I am in a space where I am meeting my Pain face to face. Getting to know It. Like you would a new acquaintance. Giving It a personality.
My Twin Flame journey is at a Pause...
It's just me and the Pain now. Sigh...ok...if this is what I must do, then let's do it.
I became acquainted with my Pain. I accepted that there was indeed...Pain.
The Pain of our very FIRST separation in the higher Soul realms.
Ok Karishma, you're the Spiritual Empowerment Coach, what would you do?
I decided to FEEL it completely. I needed to know what else was swimming within and around this Pain. If I am going to handle it, I am going to handle this once and for all.
So, I felt it. Soul tearing. Screaming. Feelings of abandonment. Like my Twin didn't love me. Like he's getting on with his life without me. Like he didn't care. I'm alone. I have no support. I can't do this without him. I am weak. Desolate. Desperate. Co-dependency.
You name it...I felt it. And I am still feeling it.
The first wave hit me hard a few days ago. Thank the stars it was the weekend. I could write it out and burn it as I always do to heal myself. I Reiki-ed myself. I did some deep self care with massage, essential oils, movies in bed, chocolates...
I meditated with my Divine Guides. Received guidance. I went into my Core Soul Vibration and turned up the I FEEL ENOUGH vibration. I felt better.
I did all that was necessary to heal myself. And I will continue until I have healed this Pain.
I have no idea how long this Pause is going to be. So, I am just moving along taking it one hour at a time.
Perhaps the Pause was created for Twin Flame Runners to finally heal all the wounds that they carry. This is new to me so I thought I would ask Archangel Metatron. He would have to know something about this!
This was what came through my channeling session with Archangel Metatron:
'A space is given to both Runners and Chasers to heal the wounds they carry intimately. This is the Pain that they carry since they first separated as Souls. It feels like a room has been created around you to handle the issues rising up. The room has all the comforts that you need. And you do end up healing it all. Very few reach this stage'
Why, I asked.
'One, it takes courage to look at your Pain and say hello. Two, depending on your Soul Contract, this Pause as you like to call it, may stretch, throughout your lifetime and into the next if you don't manage to handle it now. It isn't a failure on your part, many other things may rise up, especially if yo